Topic #7: Is this familiar: “I do for everyone else, I don’t have time for me!”
What’s so hard to get about this feeling? You’re busy with your family, kids, being a chauffeur, chef, social planner, bread winner, and teacher all while managing a job, a spouse, your family and his/her family, and by the time you get to sleep, you are up in a blink of an eye to do it all over again. Phew! I’m tired just writing that 🙂
Not having enough time for you is just not an option. We are not machines, and even machines break over time. We have needs, wants and passions. We need to rest. We just need to be. Similar to the research about kids and free play (it is imperative for healthy development in kids – for details, click HERE) adults are really just big kids and need time to play as well. Well, some of us more than others, but you catch my drift here. Along with play, or in adult speak, “a few minutes to myself” or a “girls/guys night out” comes laughter and laughter sends out feel good chemicals to our mind and body (click HERE for more on laughter being the best medicine).
So, now you feel even worse because you are not getting your deserved dose of play or laughter and don’t know how to find the time or energy to make this a reality. Chin up. A wise man once said “Prior planning prevents poor performance.” Let’s take a look at how this quote can get you on the path to changing the topic of this blog to “I do for everyone else, but most importantly, I do for me!” It’s all about planning, organizing, and prioritizing the most important person in your life… YOU. Start by making a long list of all the things you used to or currently love to do. Anything from reading a book, to shooting pool, to collecting leaves in the fall. Big or little, it doesn’t matter. Next, take out your calendar and each day, schedule 15 minutes and call it YOU TIME. Everyone really does have 15 minutes in their day. If you are reading this, then you have the time. In that time slot, write down one of the things on your list. The next part is the most important part. When that phone beeps to remind you of YOU TIME, you must follow through. Find a quite place, go outside, go in the car, where ever you can find to yourself and implement that activity. Taking these small steps will eventually lead you (and I promise you, those who live with you) towards a healthier, happier you. Besides, if you aren’t taking care of you, you truly can’t take care of others as well as you’d like to think you can. Once you realize what 15 minutes a day can do for you, start to increase that time. Don’t forget to schedule it so it is written for all to see. Let others know about your YOU time and help them think of what they can do for (and by) themselves during that time. Model for others how to really take care of yourself. That is one of the best things you can do for everyone else, anyway 🙂